tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post7760142696816353327..comments2023-06-29T08:02:35.332-04:00Comments on The Writer Chic: Walking with You - First Steps BackThe Writer Chichttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15215717851386518982noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-35993233972876615872013-01-30T19:31:22.496-05:002013-01-30T19:31:22.496-05:00Thank you for sharing such a beautiful post straig...Thank you for sharing such a beautiful post straight from the heart! I am still going through the firsts, and I am still struggling some days. But, everyday it gets a little easier, with the help of wonderful family, friends, support groups, and blogging BLMs, like you!Kayla Yowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10451279947887536824noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-87104940326690550212013-01-27T17:58:20.542-05:002013-01-27T17:58:20.542-05:00Thank you for sharing this, so much of it rings tr...Thank you for sharing this, so much of it rings true for me as well! Oh how comforting it is to realize we aren't alone! And I too experienced the scarring of those who judged my grief. From people whose live have just been peachy-keen too, ugh.Jenn @Treasuring Lifes Blessingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11064643472453403394noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-21517977924667350692013-01-26T20:30:57.341-05:002013-01-26T20:30:57.341-05:00I love this post. Thank you for sharing from your...I love this post. Thank you for sharing from your heart! It's sort of funny the odd, random things that set off our grief. At least they are random to those on the "outside". Random little things that mean so much to US. I have a hard time with Easter Dresses. Those frilly little things taunt me from their racks. <br /><br />I think that something that hurts more than words sometimes are the people who ignore us. I struggle daily with that. I would never post it on my blog because I'm afraid of offending her, but the "friends" I talk about wanting to talk to about our loss is actually just one person...my best friend since elementary school. She has never even given the courtesy of "I'm so sorry for your loss." The only time she acknowledged we had lost was when she found out a few months ago (before I did) that she was pregnant. She didnt tell me. I found out on facebook. I called her in tears and she just said she knew I was having a hard time "with everything" and didnt want to upset me with her pregnancy. That hurt worse. <br /><br />Thank you for giving me a place to vent! HaHa! I really enjoyed this post!Bettyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08934057308054901761noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-4457993354530114792013-01-24T15:59:53.558-05:002013-01-24T15:59:53.558-05:00Thank you for sharing such a beautiful and heartfe...Thank you for sharing such a beautiful and heartfelt post. I really appreciated your recognition of how far you've come... all the way from a Homer Simpson stamp to openly sharing your story with a stranger. I still struggle to talk about Gabriel IRL because his loss was so recent, but I hope that in the years to come, it will feel more natural to talk about him freely. Catherinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13860870910413734703noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-83929369946426689742013-01-22T16:24:39.165-05:002013-01-22T16:24:39.165-05:00Thank you for sharing so much of stepping back int...Thank you for sharing so much of stepping back into the world so to speak. I don't think it's a stretch at all to link play dates and dead babies. Aren't our children (both living and Heavenly) such a intertwined with so much of our lives? :)Hollyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15431384515813384025noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-34651136673500952872013-01-22T11:09:52.410-05:002013-01-22T11:09:52.410-05:00You have such a beautiful gift of writing! It is s...You have such a beautiful gift of writing! It is such a blessing to read your posts!!!<br /><br />Thank you so much for sharing.Kylahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18084101452063808419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-54449695741798338132013-01-22T02:04:59.482-05:002013-01-22T02:04:59.482-05:00You are such an amazing writer so beautifully hurt...You are such an amazing writer so beautifully hurt and healing flow in your posts. In the words of one of my dear friends, "you turn agony into poetry"! I am privileged to read the story of you and your family and be so blessed and encouraged, THANK YOU!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14497636907002853665noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-10314770381131690262013-01-21T16:14:25.818-05:002013-01-21T16:14:25.818-05:00Thank you for sharing more of your heartrending st...Thank you for sharing more of your heartrending story! YOu write it so beautifully and with vulnerability that it feels a great privilege to be able to read it. <br />My sweet sister-in-law gave birth to a stillborn back in November. I know I have not been great about reaching out to her. I cry for her and wish desperately that things had turned out differently, but being a help and an encouragement in the face of so much loss seems so difficult and maybe even impossible. I fear I'll say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing.<br />YOur post reminds me that I have to get over myself and my insecurities and fears and continue to reach out to her. Our lives are going on merrily while hers is still stuck in November. I'm going to call her this afternoon. <br />Thank you.Mrs. Frogsterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06067224159061270063noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-92153989532190349652013-01-21T13:38:04.892-05:002013-01-21T13:38:04.892-05:00Trying to find a new comfortable, among the people...Trying to find a new comfortable, among the people who are uncomfortable with loss... It's really hard to do in the beginning. But we do find our way eventually...<br /><br />I can 't get over the Homer Simpson stamp... OMGosh!Jennifer Rosshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14619769165667422761noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-41571610450888610792013-01-21T13:36:09.999-05:002013-01-21T13:36:09.999-05:00i love what you have to say, and can bear witness ...i love what you have to say, and can bear witness to so much of it, unfortunately. i have more children in heaven than I will ever have on this earth, and that saddens me. i still trip over my words when asked how many i have, and i've always wondered how insensitive i was to think about and refer to my triplets, way more than the 3 that miscarried early on. <br />thanks for your post.My name is Heather.https://www.blogger.com/profile/13360296630574425712noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-7142204758719598022013-01-21T10:34:55.935-05:002013-01-21T10:34:55.935-05:00thanks for sharing! my couple of first's (esp...thanks for sharing! my couple of first's (especially the first church service) were overwhelming too. and i also struggled with it not being "news" to those around my after only a few days, but it was still very real and painful and consuming to me. having someone there to just listen is a huge thing when you experience this kind of loss.Tinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17877281517658471816noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-63125205586692220902013-01-21T09:33:58.433-05:002013-01-21T09:33:58.433-05:00Just realized I wrote a whole other blog post in y...Just realized I wrote a whole other blog post in your comment section. ;)Kelly @ Sufficient Grace Ministrieshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11182310611088290551noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5659002609114323697.post-16734035683830982012013-01-21T09:26:30.512-05:002013-01-21T09:26:30.512-05:00Oh, how I get every word of this post, my friend. ...Oh, how I get every word of this post, my friend. And, especially, the sweetness of that victory. So many years later, I'm still finding my way at times...still stumbling over that question every once in awhile. But, I am embracing victory more often than not these days. Being the people pleaser that I am, at times, it's taking me awhile to let go of the concern over whether or not someone is made "uncomfortable" by the mention of my children. Crazy, huh?<br /><br />In recent days, reflecting over some of those early hurts...much has changed in us...Tim and I...but not a lot has changed with some others in our life. I remember in the early days feeling the separation of the two of us (well 3, actually, because Timothy's life was profoundly changed by Faith, Grace, and Thomas as well) from the rest of the world. I am noticing, more recently, as we become so public with the ministry...as it becomes a very consuming, everyday life's work for me, I am again feeling that separation from some who are "close" to us. Almost as if you are someone who doesn't "get it", I just don't have the time or desire to spend a great deal of time in your presence. <br /><br />It's unavoidable for those who tried for so many years to avoid mentions of our children...and I'm now unapologetic. Not that we are not filled with life and joy. We are certainly not walking around all doom and gloom in a constant state of joyless, hopeless mourning. But, I realize if you are someone who doesn't "want to know that babies die", you may not want to be around me. I'm pretty much a walking reminder of that difficult truth. It's in our local newspapers, we speak about them to churches and women's groups, I go to an office everyday full of comfort bears that will ease the ache of empty arms. People form a line behind us in the post office each week, as the tall stack of packages being shipped to grieving families all over the world gets processed. They ask what's in the package. I answer. They act surprised...even though I've told the story a million times. It's easy to pretend that babies don't die...to put that thought away somehow, because it's too hard to believe that it's so prevalent. They read the articles or Facebook posts and think..."That's so nice of her." But, when they see the tall stack of boxes, it's real. Families with empty arms will receive them. <br /><br />At this point, it's unavoidable for those who wish to avoid the fact that our children were here...because it's too hard. <br /><br />So, some have chosen to stay away, again. And, I'm working through some interesting reactions to that. There are days when the flesh wins and I'm low on grace...and I want to say...if you don't want to look, then stay away. We are busy serving the best we can, and truthfully don't have time for "uncomfortable" or "too hard". But, the Holy Spirit tugs and I realize that we all need grace. I'm working on it. Giving it to Him over and over. Because, I won't lie...those sixteen year old wounds run deep. Even now. <br /><br />I'm rambling now...but YOU get Me. And for that, dear sister, I'm grateful. If you ever get time, I would love to see your beautiful face. Maybe I can show you the SGM office sometime. Would love that. Or maybe we can meet up at Panera. It's been all kinds of busy up in here... We'll talk soon.Kelly @ Sufficient Grace Ministrieshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11182310611088290551noreply@blogger.com