I guess I have to claim them

 

A Lifetime Ago

I found a CD in my desk drawer this weekend, chock full of pictures and videos from the last week of my junior year of college.  Scrolling through the shots brought back so many memories and had me grinning from ear to ear.

What made me smile even harder was hearing Erin belly-laugh at listening to my voice on video as I tried my first mussel (ew, by the way) (but that’s a story for another day).

Anyway, the picture I’m posting with this entry will mean nothing to anyone but me, but I want to remember, for my sake.

 
I LOVED college.

I loved the classes I took, the professors I had, the sunshine and palm trees and daily rain showers that are par for the course in Pensacola.  I loved my hair (vain, yes, but I had seriously good hair days, despite the humidity, all through college).  I didn’t love this dress – though I distinctly remember that I paid $13 for it at WalMart the day before Easter – but I got so many compliments on it, I somehow kept wearing it.

 
I loved – love – the friends I made ( and I love that, through the wonder that is Facebook, we can all keep in touch, even 10 years later).

I love that through the wonder of photography, I can be transported back a whole decade, and spend an afternoon revisiting sweet, carefree memories.

Aaron, Lucia, Dan, Brenton, Amy, Christine, Megan, Shannon, Jeremy, Meghan, Mark, Andrew, and Julie….. I miss you guys.  (And kudos to me for remembering all the names.  Seriously, I haven’t seen these pictures since the week they were taken!)

30 x 30: Week 7

Pffft.

One word for the week: maintaining.

But.  My clothes are looser, I’ve let go a little bit more of push-push-pushing toward the big 3-0 D-day), and I ate a LOT of fruit this week.

I know.  Random.

But, let’s just say, I’m keeping on – despite a big deviation from “healthy” while I was on a self-proclaimed girls’ weekend with just me and Erin and a fridge of leftovers that needed to be eaten or tossed.

I digress.  I ate the hot dogs and I enjoyed them.  But I also enjoyed the mini pizzas I whipped up with 100 calorie wheat sandwich rounds, pizza sauce, low fat cheese, and turkey pepperoni.

It really is all about the moderation, people.  Well, and self-control (for the pantry) and discipline (for the cardio), but let’s just focus on the “moderation” part for now.

Ramble much, Monica?  Sheesh.

Here’s the lowdown for week 7:

• Weight lost: none, just maintaining.  And that is okay.  It’s okay.  I keep telling myself it’s okay.
• Total lost since July 6th: 8 lbs.
• Pounds to go in Phase Two: 8 lbs. Half-way there (again).Mini-goal is still to be done with Phase Two by August 12 August 25 when it happens, and be psyched when that happens.

Vintage Seth

 
It’s hard to believe it’s been two years since this picture was taken….my little baby boy gazing out at the Pacific Ocean.  What a great trip that was!

(On that note, happy 2nd anniversary, Margie and Dan!)

Do you have a favorite photo that just encapsulates a trip or vacation for you?

Caught up

Do you ever get so busy running your life that your feel like you’re not living your life?

I hope I’m not the only one.

There are days where I get so caught up in the details that I miss the point entirely.

Like when I take time to fix Seth lunch in between loads of laundry, but don’t take 10 minutes to eat with him, and as a result, I wind up with a bowlful of mac ‘n cheese dumped in Erin’s bouncy seat.

Or when I line up a baby sitter and send off registration forms so that Jim and I can attend a conference for my jewelry business, but then have to admit to myself that I haven’t held a successful show in almost a year.

Or when I’m working so hard to fit together the puzzle pieces of our business conference/anniversary celebration trip to Las Vegas in November that I find myself “dreading the ordeal” rather than “anticipating the getaway.

Or even in that I’m finding obsessing over lots of cute crafts and snacks and paper products for Seth’s monkey-themed 3rd birthday party (yes, the one that is months and months away) that I’m missing out on these fleeting moments of still-sort-of-my-baby two.

I don’t want to be that mom.  That wife.

I want to be more present, and yet, I find that I’m really struggling with the balancing act that is life.  And I know that I’m not alone in that.

What do you do to try to keep a degree of balance in your daily life?

I’m just one big excuse, aren’t I?

I know.

I made big promises about blog fodder and cute pictures, and I have yet to deliver.

But with good reason.

It’s been a diaper-blowing, flight-missing, football-eating, ER-visiting kind of week so far, and I can hardly keep us clean and fed, let alone concentrate on posting.  Really.  I’m surprised my head is still attached.

I mean, when Seth wakes up in my bed, and I wake up in his….you know there is a whole mess of craziness going on!

How about you?

What was the most unexpected, crazy thing you’ve experienced in the last week?

Quarter turn

It’s bittersweet to see the infant disappear, and the “plain ol’” baby emerge….

But, oh, what a wonderful baby she is!

  
Dear Erin,

Your personality blossomed during your third month here with us, and the sunshine you’ve brought to our home is unmatched – even by the relentless, 100+ degree solar rays beating down on Nashville all July (the hottest on record for Music City).

You smile, and smile, and smile some more.  You blow bubbles, and sing in the sweetest tone I’ve ever heard.  And you know how to rock out a photo shoot, poses and all.

 
At three months, you are sleeping (pretty much) through the night (if by “night” you mean “the sleep time that ends at 5 am”), but I’m not complaining.  After you eat three or four ounces at dawn, you go back to sleep for a few hours and wake up, happy and ready to tackle the day.  Or not. ;) 

 
You wake up more like mommy.  You don’t want a whole lot of stimulation (talking to, or, in general, attention from Seth) and you like to be snuggled and rocked for a bit after you get a dry diaper.

You seem to like your day sleep as much as your night sleep, too.  You take a mini-cat nap in the morning, usually around 10 am, but then you give me a three-hour+ nap in the afternoon, usually between 2 and 6 pm.  THANK YOU!  Thank you for timing this with Seth’s permanent drop of his afternoon nap.  You won’t know for many, many years how much this helps Mommy get through the day.

You are eating about 4 oz. on average, and you are starting to watch us intently while we eat table food – just about the same time your brother started to take notice.

  
Kendra has introduced cereal to your just-a-few-weeks-older buddies Luke and Abbey; I’m thinking you aren’t too far behind.  What an adventure that’ll be, huh?

You got to spend some brief-but-quality time with Nonna and Papa this month.  I think Papa is pretty taken with you.  (Maybe it’s because you look like him – chubby and bald!)

 
You also got to have a special moment with your mommy, grandma, and great-grandma:

 
You make a four-generation dream come true, sweet bug.  No one loves you more than these women, I promise.

You are moving like crazy.  Your back-and-forth rolling has turned into army crawling.  Now we just need to work on going backwards; you crawl yourself right up the edge of furniture, and then get M-A-D that you can’t go any further!

Erin, I love you.  I love everything about you.  Your little clenched hands (what’s up with that, by the way?), your hair (or lack thereof), your herniated belly button, your gorgeous baby blues, your pouty lip, your laugh.

 
I am so glad you are my daughter.

Love, Mommy

Yes, this post is WAY overdue.  Life’s been crazy….blah blah blah. ;)

30 x 30: Week 6

Well, I’m essentially half-way through my 30 x 30 journey – as least as far as time goes (not necessarily by way of results).

And you know what?  That’s okay.

I read a really well-written essay earlier this week on one of the MFP community boards.  Here is a little bit of it:

Phase 1. The start of a brand new day! (or week, or month, or year)
Expectations are sky high, usually so is motivation and intentions. This is where most people lose the most weight. At the start it's not uncommon to see 4 to 8 lb losses per week. The reasons for this are mostly (sorry to disappoint) water weight. You drop excess water quickly, and you can have up to 5 lbs of water weight. The next biggest reason is the fat that is right next to the blood vessels, the stuff that you put on in the last month or three, it will melt like butter usually.

Phase 2. Reality setting in.
At about week 3 to a month or so, people suddenly realize that they are no longer dropping 8, 6, or even 4 lbs a week. This is a crucial phase in your journey. Expect this, it is natural. You have shocked your body by changing both eating habits and exercise routine. Now it has had a little while to become used to the new lifestyle, it's going to compensate. Your body still doesn't believe it's permanent yet, so it will still try to store some fat, so now that it knows how to regulate it's new metabolic levels, it tries to store fat in earnest. It's not uncommon for people to hit a wall here, no loss for weeks. Expect this as well.

Phase 3. The routine.
At about 2 months or so, your routine is pretty much set, your body is beginning to believe that you really want to STAY the way you are going now. You will start to see more consistent (but lower, usually 1 to 2 lbs a week) loss, also, you should start seeing some muscle tone (depending on how much you had to lose in the first place). If you stop to think, you should realize that you have improved dramatically in your exercise levels. If you do cardio, you should notice how much longer and harder you can work. This is important to realize as it is just as big of an indicator as weight loss. Also, by now you may notice that your clothes no longer fit right. This is also very important. The weight may not be falling off anymore, but you are becoming a smaller person. Weight is arbitrary, if you are building muscle (which your body is doing at a furious pace by now) you won't notice huge losses, but you will notice wholesale changes in the mirror!

Phase 4. Really digging in.
This is where the second wall can happen. You're probably at between 3 and 4 months by now, and if you have gone this far, you feel like you have already succeeded. This is where many people stumble. they are tired of the routine, tired of eating different things from all their friends, limiting their alcohol intake. Basically the shine has worn off. this is when your really need to plant your feet. Maybe change up your exercise routine, make a concentrated effort to find different, but still nutritional food. Talk to people. And examine how far you have come. At this point, no matter how much external motivation you receive, it's all about believing in yourself!

Phase 5. End game.
5 or 6 months in you are probably working on that "last 10 pounds". This can be discouraging for many as it is a slow burn. Remember, your body probably feels like it is where it needs to be, your brain might think you need to lose 10 more, but your body is quite proud of itself now, it feels like it has "Done enough" and it wants to stay RIGHT HERE. The body LIKES to have a little fat around just in case, especially for the ladies (sorry girls, it's just human physiology). If you feel like you still need to lose it, prepare yourself for some guerrilla warfare against your body. Design an exercise regimen that is very dynamic, forget the "same thing every day". Make a plan that challenges you both physically and mentally. Make sure you give yourself a day off here and there to just veg. And by all means, remember, muscle burns fat at rest. So get some weight or resistance training involved.

The last 10 may take 3 to 6 months to lose. I know nobody wants to hear that, but it's true. And forget the idea of increasing your calorie deficit, healthy bodies need good nutrition, your body no longer has the fat reserves to handle the large deficits you could when you were 30 40 or 50 pounds overweight. Better to make it a 3 or 400 calorie deficit (NET, please count your exercise calories too!). It may take a bit longer, but your body will like you for it. Plus it feeds those new muscles and keeps them burning fat, keeps your skin healthy (elasticity is important when you want those places that were stretched out to "snap back") and keeps you from getting head aches and depressed.

Obviously, I’m not as far into the phases of my journey as are touched upon in this essay, but some of what the author was saying about expectations really resonated with me.  I think having that weight gain back in week four really caught me off guard and made me reevaluate not only the how but also the why of this weight loss journey.

Anyway, I have really adopted a healthier attitude about this 30 x 30, and I’ve vowed to myself that it doesn’t matter what the number on the scale is on my birthday, as long as I’ve done my best to exhibit self-control and make good, healthy choices each day.

That said, I can’t help but admit that this week was a positive one, by way of results.  Here’s a quick recap:

Random Tips:

• Divide bulk packages of treats into manageable portions as soon as they come in from the grocery store.  Jim was actually the one to observe, “if you put an open 4-lb. bag of trail mix in front of me, the odds increase that I’m going to eat a 4-lb. bag of trail mix.”

Things I (re)discovered:

• Keeping MFP up on my laptop all day is my saving grace.  Just seeing what something is going to “cost” me before it goes in my mouth does one of two things: makes me put it back, or makes me really savor and appreciate the treat.

Favorite foods of the week:

• Celery and peanut butter.
• All kinds of yummy-flavored Yoplait yogurt.
• Kroger cheddar rice cakes – a new flavor, and just as surprisingly good as the caramel and berry ones.

Weight loss:

• 3 lbs. =)  It would only be sweeter if they weren’t pounds I’d already lost this summer.  But whatever.  Onward and upward.
  • Total lost since July 6th: 8 lbs.
  • Pounds to go in Phase Two: 8 lbs. Half-way there (again).Mini-goal is still to be done with Phase Two by August 12 August 25, but I have a feeling that September 1 is going to be a little more realistic.

Yea me for being back on track!  How was y’all’s week?

A tease

That’s what I am.

My laptop is back up and running, and I’m bursting with blog fodder and lots of fantastic pictures from the last month, but it is late, I still need to get half of my kiddos to bed, and I’m currently holding three simultaneous Facebook chat conversations, so I’m just going to leave you with this:

 
More adorableness of both the littles to come, I promise!

30 x 30 Week Five

Well.

I weigh myself twice a week -- Wednesday and Sunday mornings. I should have known, after Wednesday's weigh in, that I wasn't going to be thrilled with Sunday's.

According to the scale pre-breakfast/post-pumping, I'm up another 1 lb. this week.

And I'm discouraged. And because I'm discouraged, I find myself saying, "I don't care," and opening the pantry door. BAD!!!!!

I don't know if it's partially due to not having access to MFP this week (major computer issues having me using Jim's work laptop only sporadically), or if it has been the inability to work out at home, or due to several meals out (no matter how healthy of choices I make).

I think my goal of 30 x 30 may be unrealistic, but I'm going to stick to it and just keep keeping on. I'm sure I'll need to reevaluate my goals next month, but for now, I'm going to try to just stick with what was working in the beginning, and keep making healthy choices, and pray that our friend Kevin can fix my laptop so things can get back on track...

Here are the sad stats for the week:

Weight loss

• None. Shame on me, I actually gained another 1 lb.in addition to the 3 I gained last week. =(
• Total lost since July 6th: 5 lbs.
• Pounds to go in Phase Two: 11 lbs. Mini-goal is still to be done with Phase Two by August 12 August 25.

And another one bites the dust

I love my (still, for the most part, new to me) car.

It drives like a dream, has an awesome stereo, and it even talks to me on occasion.

Like, oh, it’ll randomly announce that I should take note of “low tire pressure.”  Because if I don’t (take immediate note), said wonderful new-to-me car will decide to implode said low-pressured tire.

Oh, I suppose I shouldn’t blame the car.  It’s not like she chose to drive her left rear tire over this:

I suppose it looks harmless enough in that photo.  But let’s get a little perspective, shall we?

Yeah.  That is the bolt the repairman pulled out of my tire. The tire that couldn’t be patched, but had to be completely replaced, because I hit the bolt on a bridge and had no choice but to drive on the tire for a mile or so (as luck would have it, right into massive road construction that would prevent me from pulling over before driving another few miles).

Needless to say, having to deal with this on a day when I was dressed up (all the way in a skirt, even), late for a lunch meeting, with a hungry Erin in tow, on a 97 degree day was NOT my idea of FUN.

There’s nothing like trying to feed your two-month old in a gas station parking lot while trying to keep your cool and track down the men in your life to come to your rescue.

Thank goodness for Triple A, and their great employees who had my tire replaced in no time.  And thanks to my great dad for purchasing the aforementioned Triple A membership that I (oops) had let lapse.  Never again, believe me.  I have a whole new appreciation for roadside assistance.

More than anything, though, I’m thankful that it was “only” a blown tire and nothing more serious, seeing as how I’m hauling uber-precious cargo.

30 x 30: Week Four

Alternately titled, Not Only Did I Fall Off the Wagon, but the Wagon Ran Me Over.

Last week was rough.  There is just no way around that.  I’m not saying that an emotionally and physically rough week is an excuse to bury sorrow in food; it’s not.  But I’ve also made it painfully clear to you, readers, that I’m an emotional eater, and the events of this week drove me to the freezer and/or cookie jar a couple too many times.

Between weigh-in’s, I drove (or rode) over 1,500 miles with at least one, if now both, of my children in tow.  I attended two funerals and the subsequent potlucks and visitations that go along with them.  In addition, there were two family reunions, two birthday parties (one for a 5-year-old and one for two 30-year-olds), two business lunches, my first pulled-over-on-the-side-of-the-road-and-call-AAA flat tire, and just plain general running around like crazy with our parents and children.

Dear, close friends of ours who were awaiting the birth of their second child welcomed a baby boy on Thursday, only to learn on Friday that not only will he require open heart surgery, but his brain stopped developing at 20 weeks of gestation.  My heart breaks and asks why with every thought of them and sweet baby Zachary.

Jim and I have spent almost no time together in the last several weeks, and this, on the heels of an already jam-packed summer of travel and separation.  I know that our business is the “norm” for us, but it is beginning to wear thin.

I’m also coming off two of my medications.  I’m not sure how much of this decrease is contributing to my extreme moodiness, fatigue, and appetite, but let’s just all it to the “circumstance” pile, shall we?

All that to say, it was a rough week for a lot of reasons.  Add that to not being at home in my routine, away from my own stove and fridge, and….well, it’s no surprise I put up the stats I did this week.

So, here we go:

Random Tips:

• Only use ONE scale when you’re on a weight-loss journey like this.  My scale at home has been my friend, sweetly melting away the pounds faithfully.  And then I went to Ohio, and stepped on my mother-in-law’s scale.  Oh, yes, this was the scale that told me I had hit a total loss of 11 pounds on Tuesday, but that by Thursday, had put me back up 8.  Talk about a roller-coaster of emotions wrapped up in those conflicting numbers.

Things I discovered:

• I can’t let my success (or lack thereof) determine my commitment to this lifestyle change.  Just because the scale (no matter whose) said the numbers were going the wrong direction, I can’t give in to the temptation to throw caution (or self-control) to the wind.

Favorite foods of the week:

• Not much to say on this front.  Oh, I enjoyed plenty of sinful indulgences this week – Philly cheesesteaks, chocolate raspberry truffle ice cream, my mother-in-law’s chocolate chip cookies – but I can’t say I’ve uncovered any new healthy treats.  Here is to committing to finding a new, healthy snack to share in week 5.

Ways I know this is worth it, and working!:

• I had the opportunity to spend some alone time at the mall on Friday.  I hadn’t been in Eddie Bauer (probably my all-time favorite clothing store) in probably a year.  Seeing clothes I wanted to purchase, but refusing to do so because I I want to drop a few sizes first, was motivating.

Weight loss:

• None.  Shame on me, I actually put on 3 lbs (using the last weight from my scale, not the lower total I recorded on my mother-in-law’s.)
• Total  since July 6th: 6 lbs. 
• Pounds to go in Phase Two:  10 lbs.  Mini-goal is still to be done with Phase Two by August 12.

Here’s to a much better, self-controlled Week 5!

Erin Jockovich

Is that a horribly cheesy play-on-words title, alluding to the Julia Robert’s flick Erin Brockovich?

Yeah, I thought so, too, but I couldn’t resist.  I mean, c’mon.  It does sort of work with the picture.

Jim’s parents’ neighbor was intending to throw away this rocking horse – and it’s still in fabulous shape! – so my father-in-law rescued dear “Honey” from her demise and brought her to live in their front room, where Erin became right at home on her back (for the two seconds she could stay astride).

Something tells me when the time comes, and Erin can actually stay on the horse, these two will be the best of friends.

Hiatus, too

This trip to Ohio has been full of unexpected interruptions, and I’m having a hard time keeping my attitude in check about having things not go my way.

Sigh.

Good thing I have this sweetness to look forward to every day.

I promise, August will bring more posts – about flat tires, funerals, and my mother-in-law’s scale from hell that says I’ve gained 8 lbs in 48 hours.  Riveting material, I know. ;)

30 x 30: Week Three

Hey, y’all!

This might be the last 30 x 30 post for July.  I’m not sure how much Internet access I’ll have this and next week.  But rest assured, I’m still plugging along on my weight loss and fitness journey.  Here’s this week’s report!

Random Tips that seem to help me:

• Look for the grill marks.  When I’m forced to eat out (for example, when traveling 500+ miles, and the cooler is at max capacity with breast milk and cheese sticks), simply order grilled instead of fried.  Simple, I know, but I’ll admit, not a move I’ve chosen to practice in the past.
• Be accountable to my doctor.  Since I’ve been released from the care of my obstetrician, it was time to find a new primary care physician.  Normally, I’d stall until I “needed” one (ie – get sick first), but since I’m still on three medications (that I really want to get off of), I opted to find one now.  I found a local solo practitioner that I really, really like (at the recommendation of our favorite bank teller – gotta love living in a small town!), and he was SO encouraging when I told him what I’m doing – what my goals are, and how I want to go about achieving them.  It’s one thing to have a friend say “good job;” it feels even better to hear it from a health care provider.

Things I discovered:

• Flexibility really does complete the triangle of good physical fitness (along with cardiovascular and strength training).   Jillian’s 30 Day Shred has done a number on my knees.

Favorite foods of the week:

• “Naked” Steak Fajita Burrito with cheese, pico de gallo, and salsa verde (“naked” meaning no tortilla, just served on cilantro lime rice)
• Dr. Pepper.  No amazing revelation about how it’s not 200 calories a serving (it still is); but I splurged one day last week while at a McDonald’s playdate, and it was yummy.
• Puppy chow.  Again, a splurge, but worth it.

Ways I know this is worth it, and working!:

• Having a pair of pants (three pair, actually) that are thisclose to being “I can’t wear these anymore; they are falling off me” pants, not just, “wow, these are getting loose” pants.  (And these are “real” pants I’m already outgrowing – not maternity.  Those are long gone!
• I’m starting to see hints of transformation where it matters most to me – my face/neck area.  I mean let’s face it – my tummy may never again be what it once was – but I can ward off a double chin, and that’s just what I’m doing.   I’m ready to start regularly seeing the “before” Monica-profile in the mirror.

Weight loss:

• Another 5 lbs!!!  Yes, there are three exclamation points.  I’m really, really proud of myself.  (as of Thursday morning…)
• Total  since July 6th: 10 lbs. 
• Pounds to go in Phase Two:  6 lbs.  I’m two-thirds of the way there, people.  Mini-goal is to be done with Phase Two by August 12.

To those of you who are utilizing My Fitness Pal along with me, or Weight Watchers, or just plain ol’ determination and self-control, I’m cheering you on!

Regression

Why, yes, we are having some issue due to the arrival of a new sibling.

Thanks for asking.

;)

After hours candids

Just a couple quick pics of the kiddos in the midst of their typical evening routines:

Lil Miss, SwaddleMe’d and ready for bed, watching who-knows-what with Daddy

And Lil’ Mister, taking the more educational route =)

Wordless Wednesday – 7.21.10

Love me some blue-eyed girls!  So happy Erin already has such great girlfriends.

30 X 30: Week Two

Did y’all have a good week?  It’s been super hot here, so we’ve been indoors a lot, which has meant a lot of just sitting around, playing trains and discovering our toes.  Overall, in terms of 30 x 30, though, it was a successful week.  I’m feeling good, and seeing results!

Here’s a quick bullet point recap of the weeks highlights:

Random Tips that seem to help me:

• Drink water out of a water bottle (any ol’ 20 0z.-er will do): it’s easier, somehow, to drain a couple of those, than to constantly have to keep track of and drain one of our kitchen glasses
• Space out the treats: If I know one of my snacks for the day will be popped kettle corn, I dole out my 1 cup at the first taste, and then walk away.  I know I have the whole day to empty the cup, and I enjoy each single taste even more.  I’ve found this “mind game” works the same way with a pudding cup, a bowl of grapes, or even a 100 calorie pack of Chips Ahoy.
• Keep MFP up at all times:  It is so easy to stay accountable and to input everything I eat if the site is already running.  No need to tell myself, “oh, I’ll remember this later.”  I eat it, I take the 60 seconds it requires to input the data.

Things I discovered:

• There is a reason why it is recommended that you weigh yourself at the same time of day each time you step on a scale.  I normally weigh myself first thing in the morning – before I eat, and after I pump.  But “just to see,” I weighed myself on pizza night – after I’d eaten – about 8 pm.  Yeah.  It was not a pretty sight.  Lesson learned.
• I’ve always enjoyed cooking, but I’ve rediscovered a love for it, in trying to find intriguing, healthful recipes that both Jim and I will like.  So far, herbed rice was a huge hit with Seth, and pork in orange sauce got thumbs up from both the adults.  Oh, and Martha White’s whole grain muffin mixes?  You can’t even tell that they’re whole grain.
• Moreso than needing to drop the extra weight, I’ve learned the bigger issue is being out of shape.  Doing Level One, Day One of my workout DVD, 30 Day Shred (30DS), made it abundantly clear that I have lost ALL of the flexibility and strength from my cheerleading days.  Crunches weren’t too bad, but push ups?  Are you kidding me?  And let’s just say, carrying some of that extra weight around in the form of nursing D-cups does not make for a pretty jumping jack.
• WalMart carries cute, affordable Danskin workout tops, shorts, and sports bras.  I got six outfits for about $25.

Favorite snacks of the week:

• Kroger brand caramel flavored mini rice cakes
• frozen white grapes
• 3 squares of Hershey’s Special Dark chocolate with a quarter cup of dried cranberries – oh, yum!!!

Ways I know this is worth it, and working!:

• Random “you’re looking great!” compliment in the bathroom at church, from someone who doesn’t know I’m on this journey
• No visible panty lines in a particular pair of shorts that were just a little too tight even two weeks ago
• Better sleep, when I’m sleeping.  Let’s face it, my workouts aren’t helping Erin sleep any better, so I’m still not getting an uninterrupted  night’s sleep.
• My wedding rings are coming on and off with ease – whoo-hoo!

Weight loss:

• This week: only 1 lb.  I’m disappointed, but I have to keep it in perspective.
• Total: 5 lbs.
• Pounds to go in Phase One: 11 lbs.

Staycation on Sodor

It’s too hot to play outside, so we’ll just “jet” away to the Island of Sodor for a little down time with Thomas, Gordon, and Spencer.

Excuses

Because….

• It’s been a bazillion degrees this week, and we are trapped inside
• I’m averaging about 4 hours of sleep per night
• It has taken an average of 1 hour and 40 minutes to get Seth down for his nap each day this week
• I have a clogged duct in my right breast; therefore, I am CRANKY because I am MISERABLE
• I’m trying to make some big strides in my jewelry business in the next month
• Jillian Michael’s is trying to kill me with her 30 Day Shred
• Being the mommy of two littles is harder (and yes, more wonderful) than I anticipated
• The posts I have started are a little heavy and take more time to write than I have right now  (I mean, I could start a post with “I expect to find Erin not breathing and gone from me, pretty much all day, every day,” but I’d hate to leave you hanging
• We’re enjoying a full summer calendar with movies and ice cream and cookouts and such

Because of all that and more, Writer Chic is suffering a bit.  Bear with me.  I’m still here; just a little off my game.

30 x 30: Week One

I promise, The Writer Chic is not going to turn into a weight loss blog.  But it will continue to be a diary of my life, and right now, a big part of my life is consciously working to improve my health through what I eat and how (if?) I exercise, so, there you have it.  Once a week – most likely Monday – I’m going to post a recap of the week: what I’ve learned, where I’ve struggled, recipes I’ve found that I want to share, and of course, how I’m doing at tackling my goals, phase by phase.

First of all, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for the outpouring of support.  In addition to the comments left on the introductory post, I also received emails, texts, and phone calls, overwhelming me with “you can do it” and “I’m gonna do this with you” and “I’m proud of you” sentiments.  Knowing y’all are cheering me on is a huge inspiration to keep at it and stay accountable.

At the suggestion of several people, I checked out My Fitness Pal.

I. Love. It.

It’s basically an e-diary: a place I can log in everything I eat (which is super easy using their database) and it’ll calculate the nutritional information; in addition, I log my cardio and strength training exercise.  Using those two things, and factoring in my current weight and goals, it basically does all the “paper” work for me.

After only one week, here is why I capital-L love MFP.

I’ve never bothered to count calories or read nutritional labels, except maybe to say to Jim, “Holy cow, there is a TON of sodium in this,” but yet proceed to prepare the whatever-it-is anyway.  Being able to see the caloric value of a food before I chose to eat it has been not just eye-opening, but also revolutionary.

For example:  I didn’t start tracking my calories until Monday, July 5.  Sunday, July 4, I had 4 – yes, FOUR – cans of Dr. Pepper at our picnic.  Believe you me, if I'd been the least bit aware that this indulgence packed a whopping 800 calories, I’d’ve been drinking water.  I actually went back into the July 4 record and plugged in all I could remember eating at the picnic, and was so sad to see that dinner alone earned me over 2,700 calories.  Even with the extra 500 calories that I’m allotting for exclusively nursing Erin, that is still way, way more than I need – and it was only that ONE MEAL!!!

All that to say, I’m not going to deprive myself of the occasional Cranberry Sprite from Sonic or homemade iced hazelnut mocha, but for sure, “all things in moderation” has taken on new meaning.

I know some people firmly believe that “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”  And good for them.  I, however, probably side more with (yes, her again) Blair, who so eloquently said what so many of us (really) think about that logic:

“BULL.  I can think of a ton of things that taste better than skinny feels.  Pizza, Oreos, warm chocolate chip cookies on ice cream with caramel sauce, loaded baked potatoes, Bloomin’ Onions, heavy beers, french fries, burgers with fried eggs on them…all of those things taste WAY better than skinny jeans feel.”

Not so in sync with the whole “burgers with fried eggs on them” part, but as for her general attitude?  I’m with ya, sister.

That said, I felt fantastic in both body and mind when I sat down with dessert on Tuesday:

Whereas before, I would have loaded up one of my World Market mugs with decadent brownie-studded double chocolate chunk ice cream drizzled with my homemade chocolate-fondue-turned-fudge ( a horrendous 810 calories), on Tuesday, I chose to have a half-cup of strawberry ice cream with a couple spoons full of fresh sliced berries (a respectable 129 calories).

Again, not that I’ll never again indulge in the “before” – after all, I have just discovered that Hershey’s makes Dark Chocolate Fudge ice cream topping.  I’m just saying it was really empowering to make a choice that was not only healthier, but completely satisfying.

Moving on…. ;)

I purchased the infamous Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred DVD, and plan to tackle it in earnest after our next trip to Ohio towards the end of the month.  Until then, I’m enjoying just trying to be more active in general (when the weather has cooperated, which hasn’t been too much).  And also, if anybody has any good recommendations of mommy-and-baby exercises I can do with Erin, I’d LOVE to hear them.

I didn’t think to take measurements or a “before” picture on the 5th when this started, but have done so today, so I’ll be able to share measurement progress along with weight loss as we go through the summer.

But for now, I at least can share, happily, that I did indeed lose weight this week:  4 lbs.!

Thank you, again, so much for all your encouragement and support. Whether or not the actual 30 lbs. comes off by the big 3-0 day, I know that this change is going to be HUGE for me, no matter what the scale reads.  (The other half of my wardrobe will be happy to see me again, too, and the feeling is VERY mutual.)

This post is linked to Blair’s guest host for McFatty Monday, 30+ Mommyhood.

Fireworks, as reviewed by Erin

Her opinion will be obvious, but I’ll translate, just in case.

Make it stop!!!!

No, REALLY, Mom!  Make it STOP!!!!!

Miss E?  Not so much a fan of the things-that-go-BOOM!  Probably due to the fact that we were so close to the fireworks that are fantastic view also came with all the debris falling from the sky after each round of pyrotechnics.

 
So, she didn’t like them; I didn’t see them (as I was too busy calming her and cradling her head against my chest to muffle the noise); Seth almost slept through them; and…I don’t know what Jim thought of them.  He may have been in a borderline beer-and-brat coma by 10 pm. ;)

 
But the rest of the day?  I deem it a success.

Jason had scored prime parking for all our cars and his RV in the main parking lot at LP Field, and we made short work of getting set up and firing up the grill.

 
Seth couldn’t be bothered to eat anything, so enamored of the RV was he.  He kept calling it Mack, ala Cars, of course, and spent the majority of the afternoon exploring the dashboard, which was fine by us, until we realized he and Jackson figured out how to roll down the (crank-style) window, which, had they leaned out, would result in a long-way-down-to-the-asphalt fall.
  
Once we DID get Seth out of “Mack,” he took up residence in his new friends’ Woody and Buzz picnic set.  (Yes, Disney Pixar was well represented at our America-day festivities. ;)

After we pried his hiney from the neighbors’ chairs, he convinced Scott to chalk draw with him, and Scott was just buzzed enough to comply and turn into Uncle Picasso. ;)

Chalk drawing turned momentarily into chalk-is-really-a-shotgun shooting….

But soon the boys were back to defacing the parking lot in pastel colors.

 
I don’t have any pictures of the actual fireworks, what with trying to preserve Erin’s hearing and all that, but everyone around me said it’s the best show Nashville has put on in years.  I figure by the time the kiddos are 4 and 6 I may actually get to enjoy the show with Jim.

Until then, I’ll be quite content to spend the Fourth being Mommy – which isn’t such a bad gig.  It was a great holiday with good friends, great food, and the requisite sitting-in-traffic-for-an-hour-trying-to-get-out-of-the-parking lot.

Good times, people.  Good times.

The Sisterhood

As of Monday afternoon, I have a new sister.

 
Congratulations to my baby brother, Andrew, on his wedding to Preston, in a sweet, simple ceremony in St. Augustine, FL.

“Two” take two

30 x 30

So.

I debated whether or not this post, and the related ones to follow, would go up on this blog, or if I’d start a separate blog.

With a deep breath, I’m taking the plunge and publishing here, with the disclaimer that if I get too many discouraging or useless comments, I’m going to take these posts elsewhere.

That said, I’m about to start on a journey that intimidates me more than any other I’ve taken.  Not my move to California, my marriage, my pregnancies, or any other “adventure” I’ve embarked on excites me – or, if I’m being honest – terrifies me as much as this one.

In part, I’m anxious because I don’t have a real game plan, and you know what they say: “Fail to plan, plan to fail.”  In addition, I know that this is a sensitive topic, and I fear that those I want to hold me accountable will fail to do so, fearful of hurting my feelings.  And lastly, I’m anxious because I’ve embraced this goal, and I don’t even know if it’s possible.

In short, I don’t know what the heck I’m doing, but……

I’m going to lose 30 lbs. by September 30 – my 30th birthday.

I have roughly 90 days to accomplish this, and, inspired by Blair, I’ve mentally broken down those pounds into more doable, I-can-wrap-my-mind-around-this-number chunks of weight.

Phase I:  Technically, completed, and not part of my 30 x 30 journey, was Erin’s baby weight.  I gained 17 lbs. over the course of my last pregnancy, and I’m happy to say that I’m 1 lb. less than my starting weight from September ‘09.

That said, Phase II is a chunk of 16 lbs. I wish I had never gained in the first place.  These all came on in rapid fire succession between May ‘09 and September ‘09 – the months I was actively grieving for and recovering from Duncan.  It breaks down to about 4 lbs a month – or “only” 1 lb. a week – over the course of the summer, but still.  Drowning my sorrow in respective bowls of chocolate and peanut butter ice creams was not the smartest way of dealing with things.

Phase III is either going to be my favorite, or my most hated, either because I’m going to breeze through the relatively small amount of only (hah! “only”!!!) 7 lbs., or it’s going to be where I plateau.  These pounds can be attributed to my back-to-back-to-back first, second, and third pregnancies between January ‘07 and October ‘08.  Between the hormones and the subsequent antidepressants for PPD…well, no excuses as to why it went on.  It needs to come off.

And finally, Phase IV – my “honeymoon” weight – is approximately 10 lb.  Similar emotions are wrapped up in Phase IV as in Phase II – these are pounds I wish to not have gained in the first place.

It’s no secret to those who lived through it with us that Jim and I did not have an “easy” first 9 months of marriage.  Technically, the period between February ‘05 (when we got engaged) to May ‘06 (when we moved into our first house) was rough with a capital R.  The gory details of that season are part of another journey – a story I have yet to tell here at Writer Chic.  The relevance is only that this is where the crux of my emotional eating began – or at least, it is where I first recognized it.  I think that is why those last 10 lbs. will be the most rewarding to take off.

I know that if you add up those totals, it comes to a complete loss of 33 lbs., not 30.  Eh.  I’m a little too type A to not shoot for a round number, that’s all. ;)

So, here is where I toss caution to the wind, ask you how the heck I’m supposed to do this, and hope you, dear readers, can help me on this journey.  I’m open to your suggestions.

Here’s what you may want to keep in mind as you brainstorm.

• I’m not ready to take the plunge with the monetary investment of a nutrition plan such as Jenny Craig or Nutrisystem, though I’ve heard of many women who have found great success through these mail-order meals.
• I’m open to Weight Watchers, but meetings would have to have the option of childcare.
• We do own a Wii Fit.  It’s been approximately 10 months since I’ve fired ‘er up. ;)
• I don’t mind being active outdoors during the day, but need to continue to put Erin and Seth’s safety and wellbeing first in these 90+ temps.
• Jim’s workday is approximately 5:30 am to 6:30 pm, so relying on him to “parent” while I workout – while something I know he’d be WILLING to do – is not very practical for our family.
• I’m still currently taking Prozac for prevention of PPD, and will be on this through 2010.  (I don’t know if it causes or inhibits weight gain – I just thought it worth mentioning.)

Please be sweet in your suggestions.  As any of you who have also taken this journey, or struggled with your weight, know, it is hard to admit that you need to shed a few (or more than a few).  I don’t know why that is, seeing as how SO many people struggle with this.  I’m not sure where the shame and embarrassment come from.  But it’s there.

Shoot, I haven’t even told Jim about this goal.  Seriously.  He’s reading it for the first time right along with you.  (Hi, honey.)  I guess I took the “band-aid” approach for getting this out there: a 0ne-time, take-a-deep-breath-, fire away and let’s see what happens approach.

So, in the famous words of Bob the Builder (who has surprising pull in our home, believe it or not)….. Can we fix it?

Yes, we can.  Or, I can, with your help.  Won’t you, please?

Happy Independence Day

“T” is for TWO

Dearest Erin-bug,

You’d think that I’d start out this post by marveling “how could it possibly be two months that you’ve been with us?!”  Instead, however, I find myself totally prepared to mark this milestone.  While time is indeed fleeting, and your newborn self has already morphed into just-plain-infant, I’m well aware that sixty-one days have come and gone that you have been here with us.

eek – you’re still so little in the corner of the chair!

I have treasured every one.

With the exception of a few (wonderful, thank-you-so-much!!!) nights that Gramma took middle-of-the-night duty to feed, change, and rock  you, it has been you and me, kiddo.  Just you, me, and the whoosh-whoosh of your ceiling fan.  And although I’ll be more than ready to admit that I like me sleep, I can honestly say I haven’t minded your mid-night feedings.

I remember those days with Seth – I would feed and burp and rock him, and then try to lay him back to bed, and he’d fuss and cry, and I’d cry right along with him.  I didn’t think I knew what I was doing (and I’m sure, to a degree, I actually didn’t), but with you….it’s different.

Our moves are in sync; our routine is unhurried, yet not wearisome (even when it can take an hour-plus from start to finish).  I love to see your blue eyes grow big as you watch the ceiling fan circle ‘round and ‘round in the glow of your nightlight.  I chuckle as you manage to produce the loudest, most unladylike belches from your tummy.  I sigh over your fighting limbs; you do so hate to be swaddled in cloth, but yet, you slumber so peacefully when held almost-too-tight again my chest.  I pray over that particular behavior – that it would be a temporary infantile reflex, rather than a preference to fight the restriction that are only in your best interest.

Erin, you are my sweet girl.  My Lady Lou, my Er-bear, my Er-bug.  My McSqueezie.  (I know, I know.  But just you wait.  You’ll have children of your own someday that you’ll call by even more outrageous nicknames!)

You are astoundingly determined.  Your held control has surprised us all; as have the strength in your trunk. You have been rolling over from both tummy to back, and back to tummy, consistently since you were a mere three weeks old.  You can push yourself up over the back of your Boppy so that you are, in effect, upside down.  (For the record, that is NOT cool, and I’d prefer that you stop that!)  You’re not too much interested in the toys and rattles that dangle from your swing, bouncer, and play mat, but that will come, I’m sure.

 
You now weigh 9 lbs (15%) and are 21.5” (10%), and are filling out newborn onesies quite nicely – though I’m going to try my best to have you in on of Presley’s cute 0-3 month outfits for fireworks on Sunday.  You are in the diaper size right between newborn and Size 1.  Alas, that particular size doesn’t exist.  So we just put your in the Size 1, and pray your poo stays put!

You and I, we’ve tried the nursing thing a few times, and you are a pro.  But mommy is a wimp, and so we’re pretty much sticking with 4 oz. bottles, 5-6 times a day.  You are a messy nurser and I’ll admit, I’m just too efficient to not utilize the best of both worlds system we’ve got going for us.

The men in your life love you like there is no tomorrow.  Seth has taken to sharing his most prized possessions with you, and your sweetness has Daddy in a baby-haze – going as far to think suggest that another one of you might not be so bad to have around.  (Which it wouldn’t, but, well, in about 12 years you’ll understand why I’m not jumping for joy at the thought of giving you a baby sister.)

Grow, baby girl.  Grow your place in our hearts and our home even stronger than it already is. Make your mark.  Let it be known to the world just how wonderful and amazing and sweet you are.  I can’t wait to see what you have in store for us in month three!

I love you,

Mommy

*These “2” photos are not the ones I really want….but I have to be able to set up the shot with the blanket and sticker the way I want….not to mention that I tried to color coordinate the photo, but realize now that this outfit does not flatter her at all! =)  So, back to the drawing board – er, closet!

Pasta with Sausage and Peppers

Take that, Olive Garden!

For many years, I ordered the same dish at Olive Garden – Sausage and Peppers Rustica.  It was penne in red sauce with Italian sausage and red and green bell peppers.  And then, to my horror, they removed it from the menu without seeing fit to replace it with another dish that could pass as a substitute!

So back to trusty Chicken Parmesan I went.

But now…..

As summer temperatures has kept me from utilizing our oven, and as Jim’s work hours have kept him from manning the grill (at least on a weeknight), I’ve been having to use go-to recipes that require only the stovetop.

And this week, I hit jackpot.

It was supposed to just be “pasta,” which most of the time in our house is just some form of noodle and jarred Prego.  (Please, Lord, don’t let my Italian grandparents read this!)  Monday night, however, I decided to spice things up.

And wouldn’t you know it?  I put together the best dish of homemade pasta with sausage and peppers!  We have a bunch of sweet Italian sausage in our freezer – super great buy at Costco, if you’re interested – and I had a red bell pepper just about to turn, so I sliced and julienned and tossed those both into a pot of red sauce, and just let them simmer away on the stove until Jim was ready to head home for dinner.

I am SO bummed that I don’t have a picture to share – usually, I’m better about photographic evidence when I know I’m going to post a recipe – but you’ll forgive me this time, right?  It was SO yummy, we ate the whole meal plus all the leftovers so quickly, I never even had time to snap a shot!

So, if you’re a pasta-and-red-sauce kind of family like ours, make sure to take advantage of summer pepper produce, and try your own hand at this sweet, spicy sauce.  You won’t be disappointed.  (And if you are, invite me over: I’ll eat it!)

Picking my battles

Sometimes, even when he is super tired, Seth fights tooth and nail to go down for a nap.

Some days I flex my mommy muscle and force the issue.

Other days, I decide to let him play in peace so I can accomplish a chore or two.

And sometimes, choosing not to fight gets me an unexpected, easily-won victory:

Sweet boy.  It makes my heart all squishy to see him all curled up, in the same position he has slept in since infancy.  Ah, to be able to just play til you drop, blissfully unaware that your mother is going to snap a picture and plaster your hiney all over the interweb.

I love you, Setheroni.  Sweet dreams.