It's either the British-inspired Thomas, or the well-mannered Chick-fil-A employees

Regardless of the source, we are benefitting from Seth's exposure to polite behavior.

Last week, we met Jim for an impromptu lunch at the golden arches. As we sat there in our sticky playplace booth, Seth carefully selected a french fry.

"Mommy, this is a french fry," he proclaimed to me. "It is de-wish-ous. Here, you have it!"

I took the fry, and gave it an enthusiastic taste, while Jim commended Seth on his generosity: "Buddy, thank you for sharing your fries with Mommy," to which Seth cheekily replied:

"Daddy, it was my pleasure!"


Too funny, let me tell you. Granted, he is as prone as the next three-year-old to throw a tantrum that will make you want to rip your ears off, but more often than not, he's pretty much the sweetest thing ever to be born.

Bath beauty

Yeehaw!

When we started to plan Nonna’s trip to Nashville, I was pretty sure (weather-permitting) it’d involve a trip to the zoo, to Cheekwood, to the fountains – pretty much anything we could do to be out in the sunshine, reserving indoor activities like a movie, the science center, or the library only if Mother Nature was PMSing.

The one exception that I was keeping under wraps was a Friday night “date,” just for the girls.  When I saw the line-up for July 1 at the Grand Ole Opry, I jumped all over it.  Darius Rucker (yes, Hootie himself!), the Jane Dear Girls, and more.

I hate to spend money, on anything, and I couldn’t quite bring myself to spring for the $60 tickets, but I got lucky with a pair of “cheap seats.”  Check it out:

When Jim and I went to the Opry back in ‘08, we had floor seats, and they were great, but I wanted to see how things would look from the balcony.  I know it’s further away from the stage, but I think we’ll have a good view of the whole house….and I think we got pretty lucky with the aisle seats up in the front.

So!  That’s what’s on the Momma-and-Nonna agenda to kick off our holiday weekend!

What’s on your calendar to jump start your long Independence Day weekend?

County Fair 2010

Yes, you read the title right.  That’s county fair 2010.  I started this post, and then…..life?  Does that work as an excuse for an 11 month delay?  Well, regardless, the pictures are cute, so, I’m gonna post it anyway!

Last summer, on one of our many trips to Ohio, Gramp-e took us to the Lucas County fair.

Discovery #1:  Seth is NOT a fan of the agricultural barn.  Not a fan AT ALL.

Discovery #2:  Erin, also, is not so much a fan of the agricultural barn. lol!

 

Discovery #3:  Seth is a natural on horseback.  He loved it!  (Sidenote: we are going horseback riding when we go on vacation with Doug and Sara next month.  I can’t wait!)

         

And seeing as how fair fare is ridiculously overpriced (and probably the most unhealthy food around), we opted for Chipotle for dinner, and boy, Seth did not disappoint.  He can put down a burrito bowl like it’s nobody’s business!

Now, fast forward to 2011.  Gramp-e took us to the Rally by the Rails festival (back home) this past May, and while there weren’t pony rides, Seth had has first experience on carnival rides.  Mostly, he rode the kiddie train and motorcycles, but we also got him on the Tilt-A-Whirl, and he LOVED it!  Who knew?

We’re zoo’ing it!

I have to say, me and zoos don’t have the best relationship.  It’s not the zoo’s fault.  It just seems like drama seems to follow me in through the turnstile.  But I’m pleased to report that our first summer trip to the Nashville Zoo earlier this month was a huge success.

We, of course, had to pick up Erin’s boyfriend Xander to tag along.
 

Little Miss in her protective sun gear.
 

$100 to the person who can find Seth in this picture:

 
Of all the animals in the zoo, the boys seemed to be most fascinated with the coy fish.  Seriously?    
I personally, loved the flamingoes.  It was a new exhibit since my last visit in ‘09.

 
And, or course, the majestic elephants, which was our last stop of the day, given the fact that it was 96 degrees by the time we made it to this section of the zoo.  (Translation = way too hot to keep site-seeing.

We bought a zoo membership this year, so I’m hoping to get back next week when Nonna visits, and maybe have a daddy-date, too, in early July.  And maybe, just maybe, since we gets reciprocal membership at the Toledo Zoo, we’ll try that again, too, the next time we’re back in Ohio.

Have you been to the zoo yet this year?  What is your favorite exhibit?

It’s either the hair, or the glasses

Thursday of last week was an EARLY day around these parts.  Like, day-started-at-3:30 AM- early.  That said, nobody judge that we were noshing on microwave popcorn at 10:30.

Popcorn at our house isn’t that noteworthy.  Distraction popcorn isn’t that noteworthy, either.  But I chose to document this particular snack, though, because Seth had me rolling on the floor with his commentary as he waited and watched the corn pop.

“Mom, check it out, I hear it!”

“Mom, just you wait, it’s gonna get bigger and big!”

“Mom, you get that bowl, and I get the biggest bowl!”

“Mom, do you see, do you see?  Who’s in there on the poppin’ bag?  It’s Colonel Sanders!!!”

Too.  Funny.

Funnier, because we have fed Seth KFC all of once in his entire life…..how he even knows who the chicken maven is, let alone enough to confuse him with good ol’ Orville is beyond me!

Drives me nuts…

But it’s relatively harmless (to both them and the couches),

And it keeps them happy for a good while,

And it’s one of the few things they can “play” together,

So I suppose I shouldn’t roll my eyes too heavily,

BUT….

Man, it drives me nuts!

Recap

Thursday: early (2:30AM is early!!!) morning wake-up with a feverish Seth; no VBS; pack the car: hugs Miss Tiff’ny bye; 0 miles-per-hour construction traffic on I-71 in KY; Greema’s driveway at 1 AM and a 40+ degree temperature drop.

Friday: rain, rain, rain and COLD (wardrobe severely lacking in the warm dept –oops!); lots of hugs and tears and “look how far we’ve all come” memories exchanged; diet blown on yummy funeral luncheon desserts; date night at Pizza Papolis, Kohls, and (oh-how-I’ve-missed-you!) Handel’s; first hot tub foray in over 4 years; and Seth, back in our bed (what is up with that?) at 2 AM.

Saturday: lazy morning; shipped the cranky boy off to a day of fountains and movies with Grampe; Hobby Lobby and WalMart fun with the best MIL in the world; cookout with Doug and Sara and Sara’s homemade angel food cake and homemade whipped cream (yum!).

Sunday: early departure; Meijer run for AAA batteries for DVD headphones; Covington, KY Chipotle with pretty much the rest of the entire world; way too many potty breaks in KY; home by 5 PM; pasta for dinner; Kroger run for milk and bananas; bath, bottle, bed for the littles; The Next Food Network Star; and a sweet (uninterrupted!!!!  all night!!!!) sleep in my own bed.

Glad to be home.  Stumped on the week’s meal plan and grocery list. Forecast says rain all week but today; need to get to the greenway at some point today.  Want to pick up some cheery geraniums for the pots on the front porch.  Want more for it to be 2 weeks and 3 days from now so I can head to the airport to pick up NONNA!!!!!  Patience; it’s not so much my virtue…. And now you’re caught up.

Oh, yeah.  Erin took her first steps over the course of the last few days.  She’s getting braver and surer, but she is still pure speed on her knees.   Just a little bit longer!

VBS week

It has been a crazy week around here.  It’s VBS week at our church, so that means early mornings up and out the door, and getting home tired and hot!

I’m working on the registration and administration team, so I’m getting the chance to put some names with faces, and meet several families from our neighborhood.

Erin is pseudo-enjoying her time in the nursery with “the boys” (she is the only girl in the nursery right now!):

And of course, Seth is loving hanging out with his “bestest friends” all day long:
  
Thursday was going to be our last day of VBS, as we’ll be heading to Ohio for Zachary’s funeral, but 2 AM brought Seth to our bed with a 102 fever, so we’re just chillin’ at home today.  I’m hoping that he is just a little run down from all the fun, and that a quiet morning, and an even quieter afternoon of movie-watching, car-riding “fun” will be just the ticket to get him back to normal…

My bluebell

 

Serious Sunday morning cuteness.

Out of the mouths of babes

Seth was at my side as I was scrolling through Facebook posts in the wake of the news that Zachary had gone to be with Jesus at 4:24 pm, June 5, 2011.

As he looked at Stephanie’s profile picture – a sad, but radiant mommy holding her sweet baby, free of feeding tubes and wires – he said to me, “Mommy, she is doing a great job taking care of Baby Zach!”  He paused, and then continued:  “In heaven, Zach won’t need his carseat, and he can eat Duncan’s cupcakes!!!”

Amen, dear Seth.

No more restraints, and bring on the cupcakes!  Sweet Zach is now healed and whole forevermore!

Sweet baby….

As of early Sunday afternoon, Zach has slipped into a coma.  Craig and Steph may only have a few hours before their precious baby is ushered into the joy of heaven.

It’s silly, really….everything I know and believe about my faith tells me that the very moment this precious soul is in heaven, he will know nothing but praise and adoration for his Maker.  Yet in my heart, I still cling to a mommy’s hope that my own sweet boy is waiting to welcome him to his eternal home, and that they will go off, hand in hand, to be the best of friends that they were not able to be here on earth…

Please continue to pray for Stephanie, Craig, and Aaron; their families; our family as we grieve with them; and for all of those who have been touched by Zachary’s life.

In the waiting and the why….

My heart is so heavy tonight.

My sweet friend Stephanie is preparing to say goodbye to her son, 10-month-old Zachary Paul.

We were so innocent and naive back in 2007 when we all (we, being me, Steph, and our mutual friend Kristen) got pregnant with our first babies. 

 
Then I lost mine, and Steph lost hers.  And although we went on to have my Seth in December ‘07, and then her Aaron almost a year to the day later in ‘08, we have both been asked the unthinkable -- to give our second-born sons back to their Maker.

Stephanie and her husband Craig have a handful of days left with their sweet boy….please, please bathe this family that means so much to us in your prayers.  They need a grace and peace that no parent should have to muster, and although I know that they are clinging to the hope of heaven, there is no grief like that of a parent who has to say goodbye so soon…..

You can read more about Zach’s precious fight for his life here.  I know that your prayers and words of encouragement will mean the world to Craig and Steph.

Raspberry Pie

Outside my window…

Storms have been raging, just like everywhere else in the midwest, but look what is safe in the shelter of my bedroom windowsill:

I’ve been trying to take daily pics of the nest (as of Tuesday, all three eggs had hatched), but the rain has kept me away.  But each day, when I wake, I peek out through the mini-blinds to see the momma bird keeping her little ones warm.  It’s an awesome way to start my day.

Girls just wanna have fun

So.

Tuesday, I went to the zoo with two of my besties and their broods.  Between the three of us, we have EIGHT littles running amuck.  Yes, we’re crazy.

The day, as a whole was a huge mess.  Lots of stress, tears, and hyperventilating on my part (but seeing as someone called me a husband-stealing whore, one might expect that……but that’s a post for another day).

The redeeming factor of the day (besides the sweet words and hugs of comfort from Sara and Rachel) was seeing this picture pop up in my Facebook feed later that night:

 
I have a love-hate relationship with the whole concept and idea of “close girlfriends” but I’ve been blessed in spite of my skepticism and track record, and I pray that Erin will grow to have sweet “besties,” too.

Innocence

Wednesday night, as I tucked Seth into bed, I planted the seeds for sweet dreams:

“Sleep good, buddy.  We’re gonna have a fun day tomorrow.  Miss Tiffany is gonna come over, and we’re gonna go out for lunch, and we’re gonna stop and get cupcakes for Duncan’s birthday.”

“Duncan’s birthday,” he sleepily questioned.  “But Duncan isn’t home…”

I hesitated.  “No, he’s not home.  He doesn’t live with us anymore.  He went to live with Jesus in heaven.”

This gave him pause.  “In heaven?  With Jesus?”  A longer pause, as he watched the blades of his ceiling fan circle around and around.  “But he not remember to take his cupcakes!”

I smiled.  “Well, no, you’re right.  He didn’t take his cupcakes with him.  That’s why we are going to have some for him instead.”

That seemed to satisfy him, and he snuggled Bailey up to his chin.  “Mommy!  That’s a great idea!  I’m gonna eat him a blue one!”

Thursday morning, Seth was well aware of what day it was and what was on our agenda.  He rushed into my room (way too early, mind you), and jumped up on our bed, so he could get right up next to the picture of Jim and Duncan that hangs over our headboard.

So softly that I almost missed it at first, Seth began to sing to the picture:

“Happy birthday to you.  Happy birthday to you.  Happy birthday, dear Duncan.  Happy birthday to you!”

I was stunned, and so touched.  He really knew what the day was all about!

And then he turned to me and asked if it was time to eat cupcakes, ha!

And indeed….big brother Seth ate one for you, sweet Duncan.

You are known by your siblings, little one.  You are missed, you are loved, and you are known.

I wonder….

• Why I get so bent out of shape over a missing earring.
• If Erin is destined to be a lousy sleeper, like me.  Oh, Lord, I pray not, because two tired women in this house is two too many.
• How I became I mom who yells at her children.  I hate that, and am working to change it.  I wish I could channel some of the Duggar-skill that has Michelle only holding up her index finger in silence, and all her littles fall into order.  Man, that’d be SO much better….
• When my feelings will stop being hurt when I perceive that I’ve been either (a) overlooked or (b) rejected by friends.  I feel left out of something that occurred recently, and between who was involved and the timing of the incident, I can’t shake the hurt.
• Who will win American Idol, when the next season of Sons of Anarchy will start, and if Fox will air Glee reruns this summer.  Yes, there is a significant amount of my brain matter fixated on television programs.  Whatcha gonna do?  I’m a SAHM; the majority of my interaction with people over the age of 3 comes out of the flat screen.
• How many calories are in a Chocolate Creme Pie cupcake from Gigi’s.  Something tells me way too many to be healthy, but given items 2-4 up there, I’m gonna go with the cop-out answer of “it was worth it” and just run a few more laps around the house today….

And that concludes your daily dose of the mess that is floating around in my brain right now….you may now return to the productive portion of your day!

I think God just wanted to see me smile….

….so He planted some wild strawberry patches in my backyard:

 

We’re not eating them, of course, but nevertheless….in a string of days that has heavied my heart, this was a small burst of wonderfulness.

Just keepin’ it real

I don’t have a beautiful, eloquent memorial post to publish on Thursday – on the day my sweet Duncan would have been two years old.

Instead, I have the reality of a week that has been hard to live in.  It’s not so much the dates themselves that are the trigger points.  It’s the events.  It’s the Dancing with the Stars semifinals on ABC.  The hometown visits on American Idol.  The packing of suitcases for a trip to Ohio for what is supposed to be “only” a golf scrambles.

It is sitting in an orange chair in a green nursery rocking a baby that wouldn’t even exist but for the loss of her big brother’s life, yet still having to tamp down the thought of “two years ago right this very minute, that foolish, arrogant, inattentive obgyn was ripping my cervix to shreds.”

This week has been an exercise in survival – going through the motions of play dates, and balancing checkbook registers, and follow-up pediatrician appointments, and peanut-butter-and-jelly-sandwich-making, when really?  The anxiety and sorrow is bubbling just out of sight below the surface of my skin.

I sent an email to a friend on Wednesday telling her that I thought it’d be different this year. I thought, somehow, that I’d be better.  That it wouldn’t hurt so much.  That there’d be some closure.  That the memories wouldn’t overwhelm me to the point that I, literally, would curl up in a ball in my bed and pull the comforter over me so that the air around me became as suffocating as the sadness and longing inside me.

But….I woke up Wednesday, fully aware of the hours of the clock, and how they were racing toward Thursday.  Thursday, when I will be completely in tune with the minutes falling away until 8:14 pm.

I’ve filled my day Thursday with things to distract me – not in a naive attempt to make myself unaware – but merely so that I’m not just dwelling on the clock.  Maybe, when we are in Hendersonville running errands, I’ll swing by Gigi’s and treat us all to some birthday cupcakes.  If the weather cooperates, maybe we’ll go take some pictures by Duncan’s tree.  Maybe I’ll wake up and not be able to get out of bed, and I’ll have to give Tiffany the code to our garage so she can come in and feed my kids.  (I’m kidding.  I’m not that self-involved.  I may want  to be, but I won’t be.)

I don’t know….

We watch CBS’s The Good Wife, and the season finale on Tuesday played a Mika song during the closing scenes, and the melody has haunted me all day….

I just know that on May 19, 2009, I said goodbye to the world I thought I lived in….and two years later, I’m still learning the language of my new world.  I “smile and try to mean it,” but in these days of May, when I’m fighting with all my might to live in the moment – to be present, to be grateful, to be anything but defined by the death of my son – it’s hard, y’all.  It’s so hard.

I’d give anything to go back and have more time with my Itty Bitty fighter ….I still miss him so.

Gordon: He’s your guy to get the job done

Monday, Seth had an accident.  A #2 accident that I just was not in the mood to deal with (seeing as how we’d had more accidents on Sunday than I can count.  Seriously, it was BAD.)

So, I tried a new tactic.

I told Seth that for each time I had to clean poop out of his underwear, I’d take away one of his engines.  And sure enough, Gordon spent Monday night in the china cabinet.

And wouldn’t you know it?  We seemed to have no issues pooping on the potty on Tuesday!  Whoo-hoo!

Granted, it’s one day.

But it’s one day where I haven’t had to swish out poopy man-pants in the toilet!

I say it’s a win-win all around!

(Tiff, keep it up.  Between your prayers and my tough mommy love, we may figure this out yet!)

30 Day Blog Challenge

One of my favorite things to do on a rainy day is to curl up with a blanket and my laptop and read back through my blog posts and comments.

Granted, (and I’m blaming Google Reader for this), comments are less frequent lately than they’ve ever been.  Boo!  But I’m a lousy commenter, too (though I AM trying to get better!), so I guess I don’t have a lot of room to complain.  Still, I have been in a blogging slump (other than the April photo challenge I set for myself), and I really, really want to get over the hurdle and get some more written content published.

Enter my friend “kekis” who blogs at Fertile Ramblings. She posted a few weeks ago about a 30 day blog challenge she was embarking on (which she recently confessed she isn’t necessarily doing consecutively, which, if I’m honest, I’m guessing I won’t be doing either).  So, follower that I am….I’m jumping on the band wagon, too:

I may have to adjust some of the topics (for example, #11.  I don’t have an ipod), but I’m determined to get some things down on e-paper for posterity sake, and get back in the groove of writing regularly.

Maybe I’ll even get a few faithful readers to comment again…..? ;)

Etymology 101

“Be good.”

“Be sweet.”

“Be quiet.”

“Be patient.”

“Be gentle.”

“Be still.”

Seth hears a lot of “be” commands throughout the day.  So it shouldn’t surprise me that on occasion, he’d try to dole one out to his parents, too.

We were in Target this weekend, killing some time while waiting for tires to be put on the Mustang, and Jim was teasing Seth in the toy section.  You could sense that Seth was getting frustrated with his father, and all of a sudden he looks at Jim, scrunches up his face, and says:

“Daddy, you are not bein’ HAVE!!!” (say “have” like “cave” and it’ll make more sense.)

As in, Jim wasn’t “behaving.”

I laughed so hard!  It was just a sweet moment when right before my eyes, he grew up a little bit more in demonstrating his grasp of language and application.  Sweet boy……

A party fit for a bean

It’s her day!  (Or, at least it was her day on April 30th, when we threw her a backyard cookout with our closest friends.) 

We couldn’t have asked for a better day in a string of horrible days (weather-wise).  And thanks to Gramp-e’s generosity and some quick thinking on the part of a friend, we arranged to have a huge princess castle bounce house to keep the kids occupied and out of both my house, and the rain-swollen creek!A pre-party cheeseburger.  Because I figured once the bounce house went up, it’d be the last we would see of him all day.  And I was right.  Bounce house went up at 3, and I he didn’t make an appearance again until it went down at 8:30, and even then, it was only to swipe a frosted sugar cookie, and then crash on the couch with Gramp-e.

60 cheap WalMart balloons.  Gotta love it!
       

Her place of honor for the day:

Taking it all in with Aunt Mer-mer before the festivities began.

 

Seth getting some tips from (or maybe doling them out to?) Uncle Tommy.

 
Going exploring before all the bigger kiddos arrived and she was forced to retreat to her high chair.

My sweet birthday girl.

And her boyfriend…..love the Xander-man.

Sneaking a kiss from my girl.

Maddie-girl enjoying the first berries of the season.  (This seems to be her pose of choice lately.  I can’t tell you how many pics I have of this girl’s tonsils!)

I opted to forego a birthday cake for the party, and made a spread of homemade shortcakes with strawberries and cream; an almond pound cake with strawberry rhubarb and pineapple preserves; chocolate truffle brownies; and frosted sugar cookies.  Surprisingly enough, the solo berries were the hit of the night with the kiddos.

I was having a great hair day…..and then the thermometer crept upwards of 80 and I started running around like a man woman doing finishing touches, and well….this is as good as it got!

 
So many friends gathered to make our girl’s day so special.  We feel so blessed that she has such amazing people in her life who love her, and work to be good role models for her.  It makes it a little easier to be so far away from our families.

   

hah!  This was right after catching him placing the ice cubes, one by one, from the ice bucket into the ice water pitcher.  Sneaky little guy!

 
So bittersweet, placing a ONE on her cupcake.  Where has the year gone?

She loved being sung to….

Convincing her it was okay to dive in….

 
A little coaxing….

There we go!

 

These were the party favors I made….M&M jars with “thank you” tags with Erin’s one-year picture attached.  I was really happy with how they turned out:

And that’s all folks!  I’ve been blessed with a beautiful daughter, and a whole slew of beautiful friends and family who gathered to celebrate her with us!